Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
