just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
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