forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
