So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Randomize
