So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
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