Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
