what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
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