Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
