he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
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