is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
