@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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