Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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