Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Randomize