gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
