it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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