he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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