grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Randomize
