He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
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