new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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