also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
