Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heโs Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Oh and itโs been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! ๐๐๐๐ฌ๐ณ๐
Iโm going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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