Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
We need to get me chipped asap
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
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