i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
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