Do vagina's smell?
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize
