I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
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