Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
