If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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