I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
