he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize