Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
