Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
