so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Randomize
