Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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