i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
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