Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
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