Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Randomize
