I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I wear drunk well.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
