There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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