I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
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