her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize