Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize