I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
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