I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum