Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(607): View more from New York

I've blown a few things in my day

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(607): I've blown a few things in my day http://tfl.nu/5p5t

Replies (9) Good night (2847) Bad night (551)
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(224): View more from Illinois

his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.

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(224): his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this. http://tfl.nu/41n8

Replies (55) Good night (1242) Bad night (5145)
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(360): View more from Washington

Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.

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(360): Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe. http://tfl.nu/jop2

Replies (23) Good night (6639) Bad night (860)
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(917): View more from New York City

I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.

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(917): I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it. http://tfl.nu/n6vl

Replies (8) Good night (4340) Bad night (857)
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(207): View more from Maine

so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.

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(207): so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out. http://tfl.nu/wz4e

Replies (16) Good night (4053) Bad night (1065)
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(415): View more from California

My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.

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(415): My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements. http://tfl.nu/vs0n

Replies (28) Good night (1105) Bad night (5122)
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(828): View more from North Carolina

Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.

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(828): Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid. http://tfl.nu/baq0

Replies (2) Good night (973) Bad night (1928)
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(818): View more from California

I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.

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(818): I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself. http://tfl.nu/m9u0

Replies (6) Good night (2206) Bad night (957)
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(229): View more from Georgia

Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters

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(229): Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters http://tfl.nu/mh2z

Replies (3) Good night (2454) Bad night (852)
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(262): View more from Wisconsin

He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"

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(262): He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage" http://tfl.nu/fr69

Replies (17) Good night (8947) Bad night (1188)
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(313): View more from Michigan

So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.

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(313): So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk. http://tfl.nu/79dj

Replies (4) Good night (2103) Bad night (592)
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(617): View more from Massachusetts

So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.

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(617): So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan. http://tfl.nu/ggx4

Replies (11) Good night (1492) Bad night (518)
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(701): View more from North Dakota

It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.

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(701): It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request. http://tfl.nu/qxm8

Replies (5) Good night (962) Bad night (658)
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(301): View more from Maryland

The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot

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(301): The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot http://tfl.nu/zrh0

Replies (0) Good night (589) Bad night (303)
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(905): View more from Ontario

Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.

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(905): Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar. http://tfl.nu/gbhh

Replies (3) Good night (400) Bad night (241)

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