okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
