I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
