he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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