Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
there's paper in my vomit.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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