She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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