i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Randomize
