Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
