i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
